A day of remembering?
So. It's September 11th, and this is of course the one time in the year when I am all about remembering where I was and what was going on when it happened. Lots of things have happened since then (and I still lolz when I think about how I made a Spiderman joke when I heard the news--it kept my sanity okay) and a lot of things have changed but of course, the more things change, the more they stay the same.

Today is also my Mom's birthday. And one thing I remember most about that day seven years ago is how depressed my mom was when she heard the news. Because her birthday was ruined and well... I can't remember if this was before or after moving to the rent house (I'm leaning toward after) but August-September have never been good months at home, really--same for November-December, but we get over it. Of course, my dad tried to cheer my mom up by taking her out that weekend and getting her this lovely chocolate cake. I guess it helped things smooth over, but yeah. It sticks in my mind how my mom cried about how her day of birth would have that kind of scar on it because of the planes crashing into the buildings and that field in Pennsylvania.

So... yeah. It's been seven years since then and it's my mom's birthday. I love you, Mom. I hope you're having a good year this year what with your moving to open space and probably getting what you've wanted most for a long time.

As for me. I'm dealing with a few issues. Not too much--hell, no where near the stuff I went through last year around this time (thank god for not having a job, I'd probably die), but my attention span is the same as ever in the classroom. By which, I mean wandering every five seconds. My history prof told me not to read my history book in class because he was lecturing, but I was wanting to read more about King Richard I and the stuff leading up to the Magna Carta.

... which isn't a bad thing. At least I'm interested in the subject and paying attention to things. I just have to be mindful that it's my nature to have half a mind on what's being said and half a mind on what I'm reading. It's just how I function--though I hate that people make this seem like I don't pay attention just because I'm not taking notes and I'm not looking at them.

I've an excellent memory, really. I'm cursed with it in a way. It's a trait I got from my father, who--I actually learned from my Aunt Torchie--has a photographic memory. Isn't it always great to know why, when you were a kid and you were having a vocab quiz in a kind of game-contest thing which involved the teacher reading the definition and a kid had to raise their hand and answer, when the teacher only said the word "the" and you rose your hand before any other word could be said, so you were forced to answer or lose that point and you remember the only word to have a "the" in the definition on the list?

... yeah, that kid was me. And no, I can't remember what word it was anymore, but this is part of the reason I never study for tests and the like unless I'm very unsure about the subject matter--because I don't really need to. If I hear it once, I can normally remember the information. If I read it once, I can usually see the words on the back of my eyelid--especially if it's notes I've written down. Yeah, I normally need a trigger to get me to have that vivid a memory about it--like a question or something. "What year did the Normans invade England?" "1066. This is also when stone castles in England start becoming prominent and why the English language uses French words for 'higher' speaking--veal, pork, poultry, while they're only the cooked foods in English is actually the animals themselves in French but in English they're considered 'higher' speaking because the wealthy were normally the only ones able to afford meat and--"

HJgfdasfds.

God, I'm turning into my dad and I dunno how I should feel about it. Someone asks me a question and I have to start at the beginning and work my way forward. I'm a jack of all trades--majoring in French and Spanish while also having a healthy interest for Literature and History. And I can't not think and analyze and...

I think I'm coming to better terms with my being this way. I mean, hell... I was sitting in my History class while my prof went on about the Romans and Caesar initially trying to take over England but it failed so by the time Claudius was Emperor, they tried again and then managed to succeed--until Queen Bouticca raised a rebellion in the southeast side of England, burning down three villages--London being one of them. And because of that Romans never really got into Scotland and--

Okay, yeah, he was doing all of that and I was trying to figure out my family genealogy. Because I am win and know nothing about it. Might poke my dad into emailing me a copy of the family tree or something. Something tells me I'm doomed to be the next family historian. Orz.

And yeah. I was doing the spewing of information thing in French class yesterday. Because we were talking about the rhythms of the French and English language and I spoke up to say that in English, because it's more of a closed language than an open one like French (in regards to flow between one word and the other), there are instead, stressed and unstressed syllables which gives the English language more of a kind of continuous wave of rhythm while French is more of a gradual grow upwards until the end of a sentence kind of thing and...

My head is so full these days. It's actually been rather pleasant. Because when I have nothing to think about, that's when my mind finds things to think about. Which leads to me questioning myself which leads into that spiral of self-loathing and such and just... yeah.

So that's basically what I'm dealing with in recent days. I really think this summer helped me recover a lot from the Winter and Spring Quarter because, while I may not be where I should in regards to a number of things, I'm better off than what I was back then. Because... well, to put it simply, it really sucked.

I'm just really hoping that I don't have a seasonal depression thing and I'll be able to get through this Winter all right. I'll probably not get a job for a while, though, because I'm buckling down and trying to get all my education done as fast as possible. Even if it means I will be taking up English and History as minors if I can't get enough classes to fill the hours.

... god I'm probably going to be in school another two years at this rate, but hopefully it'll all be worth it.

And if you're wondering if I had a purpose to this post? Not really.

Hope you all enjoyed the babble!
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